HOW TO STAY ON TRACK AND ACHIEVE YOUR GOALS WHILE STILL BEING A NICE PERSON

People listen to others way to much and I get that you may not want to offend anyone but if being you and doing what you want offends someone then there is something else at play

People also don’t listen to themselves enough. And I don’t mean you should listen to your thinking but to YOU and what YOU want

Other people will always speak from their perspective and experience

Are they operating from a place of love or fear?

This is always worth checking!

Do they know anything about what you are trying to achieve and why? Have they asked? Are they really in a position to comment? 

Everyone has to make choices about where to spend their time and energy. Many people are in a rush, striving or wanting to be further along that they are. Everyone is creating and having their own experience of the world 

For most people thoughts and feelings are influencing their behaviour and comments most of the time. Many are reacting and not responding

They may be coming from a place of avoiding discomfort or achieving their own goals

They may be comparing themselves to others. Creating guilt, urgency or regret with their thoughts 

They may be looking at life through their own filters and beliefs none of which are true by the way 

They may be in the past, future or present

So the next time someone tells you that you are wrong, that you should do something differently, that you should do more, do less, be different or change your whole plan and do things a different way to accommodate them

Know that this is about them. Get curious if you want. Are they willing to have a conversation or are they fixed on changing you? Is this coming from a place of love or fear? Creating positive change for everyone or because they want to feel better. 

Do they think they are right and you are wrong? Are they open to viewing things from different perspectives? 

Check to see if there is learning here for you. Consider their perspective. Do they have a point? 

What filters are you looking through? What are your beliefs? Are you reacting or having any feelings about it? Put those aside, how is it now?

Do they do the same to others too? 

Love them anyway and let them find their own way

We can often learn from these interactions but if we don’t listen to our inner wishes and what we want we just end up having the same conversations with people who don’t want to change yet! 

We can end up being derailed not by these people but by our own thoughts when we turn inwards to begin the spiral of doubt and questioning. Because we all want to be nice people, kind people or want people to see us in a good light. But to be yourself means that may not be for everyone and they may create thinking around what that means to them.

Being kind and nice is about letting people go too. It’s about being nice to you. Don’t hold onto anyone who doesn’t want to be there, who isn’t ready or slows things down. Be there yes but let them find their own way. Their way will be different to yours and that’s great. The world would be pretty hum drum if everyone was the same. 

People have everything that they need to achieve their goals. Yet sometimes they play small, procrastinate or are afraid to step up into what they are really able to achieve. It all comes down to the reality they are creating in their internal world, where they are coming from and if that serves them or not 

You have filters or perspectives too, different to theirs. We cannot understand each other fully because we haven’t walked in each other’s shoes but we can choose to be curious, to learn about each other, to spend time together, to move on and to let go. People change, grow. Energy and priorities shift. What is a priority now may not be in a year, a month or a week. What are their priorities? 

We all have a responsibility on our own journey to be open to learning and growing to be open to change and flexibility, or we create our own problems, but we also have one life and to live it, enjoy the moment. To say actually I’m doing it this way because I want to, I appreciate your position and have considered your comments

The trick is to stay on track while learning along the way. Stay true, say what you feel from a place of love and you can say anything and if others don’t want to listen. What’s in it for them to hold onto that? 

Know when to lean in, know when to let go, know when to reflect and learn.

People will always talk, judge and not value your position because it’s not about you, let them watch as you create your magic. Things become so much more powerful when you focus on creating your magic than worrying about what others may think.

Here’s to the amazing journey that it is

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